Following the demise of the Newquay May Bank Holiday Mixed Tournament,

a gaggle of guys and gals from Chard ventured to the far reaches of West

Sussex for what was billed by the hosts, Penguin HC, as the world's 

largest international mixed XI hockey festival. It was certainly big (over 90 

teams) and it was also international with teams from Germany and Barbados,

but only one other from deepest Somerset. The language barrier wasn't too

much of a problem though.

Apart from one match on astroturf, games were played on something quite

alien to the younger members of the squad-grass! Yes, real grass. That 

green stuff they keep in parks and which needs regular mowing. The stuff you 

can fall over on without needing a skin graft and, because the pitches were 

a little way short of being as level as a bowling green, also the stuff 

which can make you look a prat as the ball bobbles over your stick.

After the initial shock of the playing surface, the youngsters took to 

it rather well-the likes of the Kelly twins, Dan Batten, James "Nightlight"

Parsons and James "Spud" Spurdle, who opened Chard's goal account in the

first game against an ex-Brunel University XI with a screamer of a shot 

when the team thought the object was to try to win rather than just to have 

good time. They acclimatised to the tournament atmosphere during the weekend. 

With a large squad, accommodation was divided between a guesthouse for 

the young/young at heart, free and nominally "single" and a holiday caravan 

Park for the family groups. The former, under the watchful eyes of Ros Clemmans

and Chairman Tom Eames, behaved so well they have been invited back to the

same place next year. The latter, comprising the Ellard/Swain, Mahoney and

Whitefield clans, fuelled by vast quantities of junk food, alcohol and painkillers,

maintained the Club's reputation for mayhem and kept the West Sussex police

on full alert throughout their stay. They will doubtless have to seek alternative

lodgings and/or change their names for next year. 

If you haven't seen the photos already, visit the website for scenes of 

on and off the pitch action.